The luxury industry is positively buzzing with a new era of sex toys that are too beautiful to hide in your goodie drawer. By Patty Huntington and Dani Maher

WAS IT the recent unveiling of a sexual wellness division within David Jones? Or, one month later, the sterling silver butt-plug necklaces and anal bead chains in Gucci’s spring 2022 Love Parade show in Los Angeles? Or perhaps Diesel’s announcement, in April, of a collaboration with LELO, a Swedish intimate lifestyle product purveyor, on two co-branded sex toys? The latter being a follow up to the launch of UK fashion star Christopher Kane’s More Joy vibrator in early 2020. Or how about designer Karla Špetić’s Australian Fashion Week show in May, during which models wore vibrating rings and the guests’ goodie bags included a tampon-sized bullet vibrator from British sex toy behemoth Lovehoney, the sponsor of her show.

There’s no denying, surely, that the sex-positive movement is blowing up in the luxury industry. But these are not your average sex toys. The products curated by David Jones, for example, from companies such as Normal, Frenchie and Vush — three Australian startups, as it happens — are so chic they look like kitchen accoutrements designed by Philippe Starck or Marc Newson, as opposed to the often terrifying, anatomically correct dildos and other sexual aids on offer in your standard sex shop.

In reality, it’s a movement that’s been percolating since the early 1990s arrival of British lingerie label Agent Provocateur, which merchandised silk handcuffs and crystal whips alongside its luxury lingerie. Then in 1998, the “Turtle and the Hare” episode of the first season of Sex and the City gave mainstream notoriety to the Rabbit vibrator. More recently, powered by the advent of social media, Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop website has made discussions about vagina-scented candles and jade yoni eggs par for the course.

In 2015, Monika Nakata, the co-founder and former publisher of Australia’s Oyster magazine, sold her business to launch Par Femme, an e-commerce store specialising in premium sex toys. “I realised there was a lot more interest in women’s erotica within the women’s community, but empowering women and their sexuality was still a new thing in 2015, it was still taboo, it was pre #MeToo,” says Nakata, who has watched on as the sexual wellness category has caught fire in the past two years. “We could feel there was definitely an opportunity to liberate women and that you could talk about periods, sex and orgasms on a platform where it was not shameful to do that.”

For Nakata, when Australia’s largest fashion e-commerce player THE ICONIC added vibrators to its new Wellness portal in September 2020, it was “an Australian game changer”. Notes Nakata: “Once a very mainstream retailer was picking it up, I thought, Well that’s it, we’re about to go.”

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Everybody has their own sexual preferences, so there’s no one-size-fits-all answer to the question of the best sex toy. You can start by considering what you enjoy during solo or partnered sex without a toy — external or internal stimulation, perhaps? From there, you can hunt down toys that aim to meet those needs, and then find something that is likely to work for you. That said, it can be a matter of trial and error — but there’s never any harm in experimenting with different options to discover what you enjoy most, because it may be something you’ve never tried before that turns out to be your favourite.

To help you get off on the right foot, we round up a handful of the best options on the market, with options to tickle everyone’s fancy.

Related: Why are we so thirsty for sexual wellness?

Consider Swedish brand LELO to be the Rolls Royce of the sex toy world: Each toy is created so thoughtfully it’s more like a beautiful little objet d’art. The Sona 2 is designed to be placed on the clitoris, and it uses gentle sonic waves rather than conventional vibrations. It’s ideal, then, for those who are looking for something different to their standard, or for an easy entry into sex toys that provides satisfying external stimulation. There are 12 settings, it’s made from 100 per cent body-safe silicone, and it’s waterproof too.

A supremely versatile toy, the Lovense Lush 3 can be controlled via an app. Give it a try solo, or hand the controls over to your partner (whether they’re in the room with you, or on the other side of the world). There are three speeds and four patterns of vibration — or via the app, you can explore unlimited options, including setting it to music or as a far more satisfying morning alarm. The curved design simultaneously stimulates the clitoris and G-spot, and a five-hour rechargeable battery allows for long-time play.

Created in collaboration with Australian media sensation Abbie Chatfield, Vush’s Abbie is a versatile toy for all genders. It can be used internally or externally, with the pretty floral detailing offering extra stimulation as well as a cute aesthetic. It has 25 settings, is near silent, and the long neck makes it ergonomic to hold for extended periods.

The Tor 2 can offer plenty of solo stimulation, but worn during partnered penetrative sex, it can enhance stimulation for both of you. Designed to be worn around the penis, the fully waterproof toy features an easy-to-use two-button control interface with six modes. The subtle design is far less intimidating than some of its counterparts, too.

An exclusive collaboration between Lovehoney and Womanizer that harnesses the latter’s revolutionary pleasure air technology, the Womanizer Pro40‘s reputation precedes it. Singer Lily Allen has claimed Womanizer toys “changed my life”, and countless reviewers agree. The best-seller combines gentle suction with pulsations to stimulate the clitoris, with six intensity levels on offer.

Rabbit vibrators generally feature a shaft for internal stimulation with “ears” to stimulate the clitoris, and as such, aren’t always the prettiest toy on offer — but the Soraya Wave is the exception. WaveMotion technology mimics the movement of internal penetration, with the clitoral stimulator offering full-body sensations. You can turn on the bigger or smaller arms separately or together, and there are eight pleasure settings for you to play with.

A massage wand vibrator is a classic sex toy design, and this one from Mantric modernises it with a convenient rechargeable battery (no need to plug into a wall socket and worry about cord length). Seven modes of vibration offer versatility, and the large rounded head and flexible neck can glide across the entire body to engage all the senses — and yes, it genuinely works as a deep tissue massager too.

Perfect for solo or partnered sex, the Eva II by Dame is a hands-free wearable toy —the flexible ‘wings’ are designed to tuck under the labia majora to stay in place on its own. Crafted from silicone, it’s USB rechargeable and waterproof, with a simple on-off button that controls the three speed settings. Simple, but effective.

From cheeky Australian start-up Frenchie comes The Double Entendre, a vibrator designed for internal and external stimulation for all genders. It has four speeds and six vibration modes, with a smaller head at one end for internal stimulation and a larger profile for external stimulation — and with its bendable design, you can use it internally, externally, or both at the same time.

LELO’s Enigma is the last we’ll feature from the brand (what can we say, they’re experts for a reason) but certainly not the least. As always, it’s elegantly designed, but reviewers say it performs just as well. Designed to simultaneously stimulate the G-spot and the clitoris with sonic waves, it has eight settings, is 100 per cent waterproof, and is made from premium super-soft silicone.

Sometimes, all you need is simplicity. We-Vibe offer a great range of toys (including plenty of partner-friendly ones that get stellar reviews), including this powerful bullet vibrator. A great entry-level toy, bullets are small, discreet, and easy to use — simply glide them across any external part of your body to experiment with stimulating the nerve endings. You can get them super cheap, but some of the cheapest models don’t pack enough punch according to reviewers — unlike this one, which has seven vibration modes and eight intensity levels.

Kegel balls have been used for centuries to strengthen vaginal and pelvic floor muscles — and they can also be very pleasurable when used alone or with other vibrating toys. Soft and slightly weighted, these ones from Par Femme have soft ribbed edges to better retain lube for your comfort, and to add to the sensation.

Another popular collaboration between Womanizer and Lovehoney, the InsideOut features a clitoral stimulator that offers the same patented Pleasure Air Technology as the Pro40, while the smooth, curved silicone shaft targets internal erogenous zones. 12 escalating intensity levels are on offer for each element — the internal and external stimulators — so you can tailor your pleasure exactly to your liking.

This mini wand toy has an impressively affordable price tag, and yet it’s surprisingly powerful. Like it’s larger counterparts, it can be used with or without a partner, for sexual pleasure or just a soothing massage. Seven patterns, each with 10 intensity levels, offer customisable sessions, and the non-intimidating design makes it ideal for sex toy first-timers.

It depends on the toy in question, so your best bet is to refer to the instructions for use included in the box. Most toys are designed to be used with lubricant, for an easier and more pleasurable experience.

Lovehoney has a great range of lubes for every purpose, or you can turn to Australian brand Frenchie’s natural water-based aloe vera lube.

You should always refer to the care manual for the particular toy in question, as the varying materials can require different cleaning methods. Generally, though, a sex toy cleaner (like Lovehoney’s Fresh Toy Cleaner) is your best bet: Simply spray on before and after use, then rinse off and allow to dry thoroughly before storing away (preferably in a satin, silk, or other storage bag).

Harper’s BAZAAR participates in various affiliate marketing programs, which means we may get paid commissions on editorially chosen products purchased through our links to retailer sites.

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